What I wanna be proud of when I'm 90. . .

Recent events has made me question what I'm doing with my life. I guess with my parents moving away and retiring in the Phillipines and my sister moving to go to Australia, my friend having a new baby, my other firend getting married, and changes in general in my own life have stuck a chord. So where does one go for answers? The Bible? Priest? God? The dude on top of the mountain? Wuotes from Ghandi? Random Vancouver homeless dude? Hell no. I went to the internet! (Though a lot internet links lead you back to those answers above) And as always I found how much I want an answer cause it starts off with long articles about how you to change your life. But the funny thing, they just say you need to be like this. They never explain how. Until I got to a site called simplethinknow.com. A good site that is like a blog like this but you know with people who know what they atalking about. Cause who wants to read someone's weird rant about stuff he found on the internet (That's you, ain't it? Don't worry. At least you're not the crazy dude ranting. . .) So what did I discover? I want to help people and make a difference. Surprised? If so, you don't know me well. But then again, that's why you be here right? No biggie right? But the how I want to do this is surprising. It's not that I didn't think music could make a differecne. It's madea huge difference in mine. Songwriting has giving me a chance to explain things I could never explain without. Singing has given me hope when I fell into the dark holes that I sometiems fall into. And the right song can make me run another km when I just wanna collpase in a heap to make me smile when the worst is the only thought left in my head. But could I make a difference in this world with music? Would it matter? Am I that good? Then my friend helped me see that maybe being good enough may not be the point. The point is I go for it. The point is finding a purpose in life. To try and do something, cause it's really hard to make a difference when you don't try. When fear pushes you down and you don't get up. And haveing a purpose is the first step to making a difference. So I have a purpose. What now? Well, I guess that's a story for a different blog. If I feel like wrting it, cause you know, I'm a lazy ass. . .word. BJB